Keep your arms inside the vehicle at all times

I wonder how much longer this policy will last:

If you want to keep your checked valuables from being stolen while you fly, just keep a gun in your suitcase.

Many airports won't let you effectively lock your suitcases when you fly, and the new limits on carry-on luggage thanks to moisture-terror-hysteria mean it's open season for unscrupulous TSA employees and baggage handlers who want to help themselves to expensive cameras and other valuable in checked bags.

But once you add a gun -- even a starter pistol -- to your luggage, it gets extra-locked, gains new tracking privileges, and is subject to heightened scrutiny all the way to your destination.

This would have been helpful a week or so ago, before TSA "randomly inspected" my checked baggage and dumped all of my shampoo (in the 3oz bottle) out, then placed the open container bag in the toiletry-bag, soaking everything else in the bag with shampoo, including my toothbrush. Fortunately, they let a note explaining that my luggage had been searched in the name of Security!, and that I shouldn't worry my pretty little head over the Affairs of State.

Not the worst TSA story ever, but the little things count. Flare-guns are affordable.

Evidently, I will always be at an age at which the Feds will want to wash out my mouth with soap.