Another notable name is joining Barack Obama's Cabinet -- former Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle will be Health and Human Services secretary pending Senate confirmation, FOX News learned Wednesday...
As Health and Human Services chief, Daschle will be responsible for helping set health care policy. He supports a government-funded insurance program for the nation's uninsured.
Daschle has also been the head of the health care working group in the Obama transition team. Democratic officials shied away from a term some are throwing around -- "health care czar" -- but say Daschle "is likely to play a leading role in the passage of health care reform and the strategy to implement it."
Upcoming predictions for the cabinet-positions:
Secretary of State: Hillary Clinton
Secretary of the Treasury: Karl Marx's Mummy, with guest puppeteers from "Avenue 'Q'"
Secretary of Defense: N/A; this position is to be subsumed by Secretary of Homeland Security
Secretary of the Interior: Saruman; has experience with forest management policy beneficial to the aims of the State
Secretary of Agriculture: Robert Mugabe; expected to accept after having exhausted Zimbabwe's resources
Secretary of Commerce: Paul Krugman; expect a lot of "use a bigger mallet" theory
Secretary of Labor: Mola Ram; an equal-opportunity employer of children, followers strikingly similar to Obama-volunteers
Secretary of Health and Human Services: Tom Daschle
Secretary of Housing and Urban Development: The Borg Collective
Secretary of Education: Ted Turner; infrastructure for mass-programming already in place
Secretary of Energy: Tinkerbell; provides an endless and renewable source of pixie-dust
Secretary of Veterans' Affairs: TBA; "Veteran" implies turnover in enlistment
Secretary of Homeland Security: The Smiths; 'Nuff said.
3 comments:
Ick. Why does this election have a "Night of the Living Dead" feel to it?
Perhaps it's because of all the old corpses from a previous age thought long forgotten have come to life?
It seems like our only hope is a large stockpile of heirloom seeds, firearms and ammunition, Ayn Rand novels in case the ammunition runs out, and a boom-box with "Thriller" on infinite-loop.
Dystopia, here we come!
Why does this election have a "Night of the Living Dead" feel to it?
They're coming to get you, Wapiti!
Look, Wapiti! There's one of them now!
(Just a little old-school movie quoting) ;)
If they make a movie about the election, perhaps Patricia Tallman can play Sarah Palin.
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